A Thunderous Day in Hazzard
by jasonstoneface
Summary: Crossover between the Dukes of Hazzard and Power Rangers. The Duke Boys help two former Power Rangers get married.


Disclaimer: This is a crossover between "The Dukes of Hazzard," and "Power Rangers Dino Thunder," post Dino Thunder, of course, and neither of which I own.

Author's Note: That's right, the Dukes and "Power Rangers Dino Thunder." Anyone who's read my Power Rangers stories knows that I am steadfastly loyal to the original Power Rangers show, and I will always be. But, I actually took the time to watch a little bit of Dino Thunder and found that I actually liked it (the few episodes I've seen anyway.) I also watched the SPD episode "History." This is a Tommy/Kira romance, and just so I don't raise any legal suspicions, Kira is old enough, as will be explained in the story. Tommy and Kira is a pairing I originally found unorthodox to say the least, but it's one I've slowly grown fond of. This is part of a challenge I made with Tormenta Cristal. This was inspired by the Dukes Season 2 Episode "The Runaway" as well as the "Return of the General Lee" video game.

Additional Notes: '' indicates thoughts and parentheses indicates lines by the Balladeer.

A Thunderous Day in Hazzard

A bright orange car was casually making its way along the dirt roads of Hazzard County in Georgia. It had a big "01" on both sides and a Confederate flag on top with the name "General Lee" close to it. A blonde-haired man was behind the wheel with a dark-haired man riding shotgun.

_Now, friends and neighbors, this is a rare site: seein' the Duke boys not being chased by the law. That's because they was out picking blackberries. But if ya'll know anything about Hazzard, ya know that trouble is bound to be loomin' around the corner._

Bo Duke shoved some blackberries into his mouth. He smiled and said, "You know something, Luke? There ain't but one thing better than fresh blackberries in the summertime, and that's fresh blackberry pie."

Luke Duke looked at his cousin and replied, "Yeah, provided we can get any back to the farm."

Bo looked at him and said, "Aw, c'mon, Luke, you ate some too."

"Yeah. Five. You've already eaten, what, five fists full?"

As the General Lee headed back to the Duke farm, a military-style Hummer made its way from behind. Without warning, it made its way around the Duke boys, causing Bo to have to hastily pull off the dirt road. They stopped within inches of running side-first into a tree.

_See? I told you._

Angry at what just happened, Bo asked, "Did you see what I just saw?"

Luke frowned and said, "I sure did. See if you can catch up to them. Whoever's driving that Hummer, I want to give him a piece of my mind."

At least a mile down the road, the Hummer rode past a small batch of trees. It was there that a fifty-something man in a police uniform had been waiting, accompanied by a lazy brown basset hound, watching his radar gun. He let out a goofy smile and said, "Ghh, ghh, ghh! I got 'em, I got 'em!" The sirens of his patrol car started blaring as he made off after the Hummer.

Hazzard County commissioner Jefferson Davis (J. D.) Hogg, better known in Hazzard as Boss Hogg, was putting up posters of his latest "deals" on the walls of the Boar's Nest. He smiled and laughed lightly, cigar in his mouth, as he dreamed of the money he could make. Just then, the Hummer pulled up and came to a stop. Two men in military uniforms stepped out and popped the hood as smoke came from the engine. As they were examining their vehicle, the police car that had followed them pulled up and the fifty-something man stepped out, saying, "All right, I gotcha. I'm gonna give you a ticket and don't bother trying to weasel your way out of this."

One the soldiers, a tall, well-built African-American with "Smith" on his name tag said, "With all due respect, officer, we are high-ranking officers for the U. S. Army."

The policeman remarked, "That don't matter. I'm Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane and I say I'm gonna give you a speeding ticket."

Boss Hogg walked up and said, "Hold on, Rosco." He saluted Smith and addressed the two soldiers saying, "I'm County Commissioner J. D. Hogg. Why, might I ask, are you two soldiers, servants of our great nation, in Hazzard County?"

The other soldier, a shorter and smaller, but still in tip-top condition, Caucasian with a buzz-cut of brown hair underneath his beret and the name "Wesson" on his name tag answered, "We're escorting someone to Tallahassee. Take a look in the back seat." Boss Hogg and Rosco looked in the back to see a girl with curly blonde hair and a cold look of displeasure on her face. Refusing to acknowledge anybody, the girl just sat there as Wesson continued to explain. "That's Kira Ford. Granddaughter of General Ernest P. Ford. General Ford is attending an air show in Tallahassee. We're taking her to meet him at 09:00 hours tomorrow morning. She's going on a full-expenses paid cruise in the Carribean."

Smiling and chuckling, Boss Hogg said, "Well, if that's the case, we don't want you to be late, do we? Rosco, raise Cooter on the CB and see if he can have this Hummer fixed."

At that moment, the General pulled up and moved past the whole party before coming to a stop. Climbing out of their car's windows, Bo and Luke approached. Bo said, "Mister, military or not, you dang near ran us off the road and I don't appreciate that."

Luke then added his two cents. "Rosco, I think you'd be doing Hazzard and this country a favor by writing them a ticket."

Pulling his cigar from his mouth, Boss Hogg said, "No! Absolutely not! I am not going to have you dang Dukes cause a mess of trouble over something you probably started in the first place."

"We started it?" asked Bo in astonishment and disbelief. An argument then ensued, distracting all from the Hummer. While this was going on, the girl in the Hummer quietly opened the far back passenger door and slowly made her way toward General Lee.

_Now this is where the fun begins._

When she couldn't open the doors, she started to panic. Finally, she quickly climbed in through the window.

Bo and Luke were still arguing with the soldiers, Rosco, and Boss, when the short, bald, fat, commissioner in the white suit and cowboy hat finally cried out, "ENOUGH!" He said in the mock kind voice that the Dukes knew so well, "Bo, Luke, please. If you will forgive these two gentlemen and leave, I'll let you off the hook. Otherwise, you could be looking at a charge of disturbing the peace."

Bo asked dumbfounded, but still angry, "Disturbing the peace? Boss Hogg, I'll have you know. . ."

Luke cut him off. "C'mon, Bo. You know as well as I do there's no use arguing with them." He had to physically pull his cousin away and back toward the General. They climbed in and left, still muttering about Boss and Rosco's crookedness.

When the Dukes were gone, Boss Hogg said, "Now, where were we? Ah, yes, I was just going to have the sheriff . . ."

He was cut off by Smith, who had turned back to the Hummer, only to discover their passenger was missing! "She's gone! Where'd she get to?"

Boss Hogg then cried out, "The Duke boys!"

"Duke boys?" asked Wesson. "Who are they?"

Boss pointed in the direction the General had left and explained, "The ones that took off in that bright orange car!"

Just then, a red, white, and blue tow truck parked at the Boar's Nest. Out stepped a sweaty, stubby man up to his chest in oil and grease. His messed up hair was covered by a worn-out cap. Seeing him, Boss Hogg said, "Cooter! See if you can get this Hummer fixed! Rosco, come on! We gotta get after them Dukes!"

As they sought to get in the police car, Rosco said, "That's a big 10-4, little fat buddy!"

Once they were in, Boss Hogg found himself side-by-side with Rosco's dog. "Keep this mangy mutt away from me!"

"Don't mind Boss, Flash," said the sheriff, trying to console his dog (not that she seemed to care). "He gets irritated so easily." Rosco turned on his sirens and drove off as a confused Cooter Davenport watched and began getting to work.

As Bo kept driving toward the Duke farm, he said, "I'm hungry, hand me some more blackberries."

Luke responded, "Sheesh, save some for the pie, will ya?" However, as he reached into the back seat without looking, he stopped as he felt skin. He smiled and looked in the back, pulling the unexpected guest into view. She had curly blonde hair, and was dressed in a yellow, sleeveless halter top, a black silk skirt that fell just below her knees, and knee-high black boots. Luke said, "Well, well, looks like we've got ourselves some company."

Bo smiled his goofy smile, adding, "And some mighty pretty company, too."

The girl just smiled nervously and said, "Um . .. hi." She quickly looked over her shoulder. Seeing that they were expecting her to speak, the girl said, "Sorry. I don't really like talking to strangers."

Bo smiled again and said, "Alright. I'm Bo Duke. This here's my cousin, Luke."

After a short pause, the girl, still nervous, said, "I'm Kira Ford."

Still smiling, Bo responded, "Alright, Miss Kira Ford. Now we ain't strangers anymore."

Kira let out another nervous smile and looked over her shoulder again. After another short pause, Luke spoke up. "So, you mind telling us who you're running away from?"

Caught off-guard by this question, Kira asked in surprise, "How did you know I was running away?"

"Well, when we're running away from someone, we always look over our shoulder."

Another nervous pause later, Kira finally answered Luke's question: "My grandfather."

As Boss Hogg and Rosco were trying to chase down the General Lee, Boss Hogg said, "Them Duke boys got too much of a head start. Rosco, call Enos and have him cut them off."

"Right," said Rosco as he picked up his CB. "Enos, this is your superior officer, Rosco P. Coltrane. You got your ears on, come on back?"

Deputy Enos Strate was snoozing, his patrol car parked at a fork from the dirt road to the paved road. He was snapped awake by the sound of the sheriff's voice. He looked around him and finally realized what was going on. He quickly grabbed his CB, saying, "I'm here, Sheriff."

Rosco then said, "I'm in pursuit of the Duke boys on Highway 36 headed toward Choctaw Road. I want you to go there and cut them off. Is that an affirmative?"

"Yes sir, Sheriff," said Enos. "I'm gone." He then turned on his sirens and took off towards his ordered destination.

As General Lee continued down the road, the Dukes and Kira heard sirens. Looking over their shoulders in unison, Bo quickly turned back to the road ahead saying, "Well, that ain't your granddaddy, that's old Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane himself."

Boss Hogg grabbed a bullhorn, stuck his head out the window and cried, "Duke boys! Pull over! That's an order! Do you hear me?"

"Boss Hogg is with him?" asked Bo in disbelief.

Luke then asked, "What're they chasing us for? We ain't done nothing."

"Me!" said Kira in panic. "I'm what they want! Please, don't let them take me away! I'll explain everything, I promise!" She was practically begging now.

Bo replied, "Well, if Boss Hogg's after you, that's good enough for us."

"Hit it, Bo!" Luke all but ordered.

"You don't have to tell me twice. Hang on, Kira!"

As Bo put the pedal to the floor, Luke remarked, "The way Bo drives, you should always hang on."

A short drive later, the General passed Choctaw Road, Rosco's patrol car in pursuit. Enos' patrol car then came off Choctaw Road and was at Rosco's right side. Rosco got on his CB and said, "Enos! You were supposed to cut them off!"

Enos defended himself, saying, "Sorry, Sheriff, but they were going too fast."

"I can see that, you dipstick! Now hush!"

Hearing an extra pair of sirens, Kira looked over her shoulder again. "Now there's another cop on our tails."

"Enos," said Bo and Luke in unison.

Bo then decided to go off-road. As the two police cars followed, Bo noticed two trees up ahead that weren't very far apart. Bo asked, "Should I?'

"You're driving," said Luke.

"Thanks a lot, cuz," said Bo sarcastically. Decision made in the blink of an eye, the General went right between the trees. Rosco and Enos's patrol cars, however, weren't going to make it.

Realizing this, Rosco let out a, "Ooooo!" as he swerved to his right while Boss Hogg screamed and cowered. Enos, too, cried out in fear as he swerved his car to the left , and both patrol cars slammed side-first into the trees. The General was then swerved to a stop back on the dirt road.

Coming back to reality, Rosco said, "Those dad-blame Dukes! I done scuffed my vehicle!"

Before anything could be said, Boss yelled, "Rosco, you do-do! Can't you do anything right?"

"It wasn't my fault, Boss. Enos should have been behind me."

As Boss gave Rosco and Enos a tongue-lashing, Bo, Luke, and Kira watched and couldn't help but chuckle. Satisfied that all were okay, Luke said, "Allemande left and do-si-do."

"Step on the gas and away we go," finished Bo. "Yee-hoo!" This made Kira's smile widen as the Bo drove off.

_Later, back at the farm, Kira was explaining her story to the Dukes over Uncle Jesse's crawdad bisque._

As Kira ate, Bo and Luke listened to her story along with an old man in overalls and a young woman wearing a white lace-up top and the shortest shorts you'd ever seen with stiletto heels. Bo asked, "Dr. Tommy Oliver, huh? You fell for one of your teachers?"

Kira nodded. "My grandfather is a high-ranking General. 'Hard-nose' doesn't even begin to describe him. I can't even imagine how furious he was when my dad decided he didn't want to pursue a career in the military. He didn't approve of my mom, he didn't approve of me. It's as if he didn't approve of anything pertaining to our family anymore. It was during my senior year in high school that I met Tommy. It was his first teaching gig. After graduation, I moved to New York to pursue my music career. When I was nineteen, I went back to Reefside to attend my first high school reunion. Unfortunately, while I was there, both of my parents died in a house fire. I was so overcome with grief that I couldn't make myself go back to New York, so I put my career on hold. Tommy offered me a place to stay, which I gladly accepted. Next thing you know, we fell in love. On my twentieth birthday, he proposed to me." Kira smiled before adding, "I don't think I have to tell you what I said." Her smile then disappeared as she sighed. "Somehow, my grandfather got word. I guess this was the last straw as far as he was concerned. Four months after our engagement, he had his two soldiers forcibly take me away after sedating Tommy. We've been going in Hummers and Jeeps this whole time so as not to draw national attention. Fortunately, Tommy has his own 'friends in high places,' so to speak, and has been tracking me these last few months." She had been careful not to reveal that she and Tommy had both been Power Rangers.

Her story finished, Daisy Duke asked, "Kira, you said this guy was your teacher, right?" Kira nodded. "Don't you think he's a little too old for you?"

Kira shrugged and said, "I'm twenty, he's twenty-eight. It's not that big an age difference."

"Yeah," agreed Luke. "There are sixty-something guys and older who marry women half their age."

"Besides," added Bo, "Uncle Jesse and Aunt Min were five years apart."

**Author's Note: I don't know if they ever actually named Uncle Jesse's wife, so I made up a name.**

As Uncle Jesse stood up and walked toward the coffee pot, he said, "Well, Kira, if what you're saying is true, you can bet your bottom dollar this farm is going to be the first place that Rosco will look." Having poured himself a fresh cup, he turned back to Kira and added, "Not that you ain't welcome here." This made Kira smile. She was glad he understood.

Just then, a voice came over the nearby CB in the Dukes' kitchen. "Breaker one! Breaker one! Might be crazy, but I ain't dumb. Crrrazy Cooter comin' at ya! Any of you Dukes home on the Hazzard-Net? Come on back."

Uncle Jesse walked over to the CB as quick as he could and picked it up. "This here's Shepherd, Cooter. Go ahead."

Back at the Boar's Nest, Cooter was at his tow truck's CB watching the Hummer drive out of sight. "There's two tough guys in army uniforms headed ya'lls way. They must've gotten someone inside to tell them where you lived."

"We understand, Cooter," said Uncle Jesse. "Now, listen, I don't want you to come over to the farm, but head out to still number two. We'll meet you there and fill you in later, got that?"

"Yes sir, Uncle Jesse. Crazy Cooter, over and out."

_As for Tommy, everything was going wrong for him. His cell phone's battery had run down, and he couldn't charge it with the cigarette lighter busted. And now his Jeep had broken down. But little did he realize that his luck was about to change._

Dr. Tommy Oliver was in a bathroom stall at a garage, talking into a small hand-held communicator. He was in contact with Time Force Rangers Wes Collins and Eric Myers. Thanks to advanced communication equipment, they were able to keep track of Kira's whereabouts and zero in on all communications between General Ford and his soldiers. Knowing Power Rangers, and having been one yourself certainly had its advantages. "I couldn't have picked a worse time to break down. Not when I was so close to getting Kira back."

"Actually, Tommy, you may have gotten lucky," said Wes. "Last we heard, they were in a small county called Hazzard."

"I was able to listen in on the local sheriff's CB frequency," said Eric. "It appears she was able to hitch a ride with someone called 'the Duke boys.' Unfortunately, Smith and Wesson contacted General Ford. He's going to chopper in."

"In that case, I'd better get moving," said Tommy. "I'm going to try and see if I can get in touch with her. You'll keep me posted on any further developments, right?"

"You know we will, Tommy," answered Wes. "Good luck." Tommy then closed his communicator.

Tommy quickly ran out and found a payphone. He picked up the phonebook and flipped through the various counties. "Chickasaw. . . Fulton. . . Hazzard." He then quickly flipped to the "Ds" and began going through names. "Duke. . . Duke. . . Duke. . . Jesse L. The only Duke listed here." He picked up the receiver, quickly deposited his money, and dialed. As he heard a ring, he crossed his fingers and said to himself, "Please be there, Kira."

Back at the farm, the Dukes were discussing what they were going to do when the phone rang. Bo said, "I'll get it." He picked it up and answered. "Hello? Duke farm. Bo Duke speaking."

Tommy bit his bottom lip and said, "Um. . . hi. Is there a Kira Ford there?"

Bo said, "Well, if this a Tommy Oliver, then the answer is yes." All eyes turned to him at the mention of Tommy's name.

Kira asked, "Can I speak to him?" Bo handed her the receiver. She let out a deep breath to compose herself and asked, "Tommy?"

The voice on the other end made her heart sing: "Kira?"

Kira nearly jumped for joy. "Tommy! Thank God it's you! Where are you?"

Tommy answered, "I'm about an hour's drive from Atlanta. My Jeep broke down, so I'm going to have to rent a car. I hope I can reach you before your grandfather does."

Kira then put her hand over the speaker and said, "He's going to come get me!"

Uncle Jesse then said, "Not here, he ain't. Give me that phone." When he got it, he said, "Tommy? This is Jesse Duke. Now listen, this farm ain't gonna be safe much longer, so here's what I want you to do: When you get your car, make sure it's got a CB in it. Keep it tuned to channel 9. Just listen in, don't talk unless we ask you to. Try and meet us at the garage in Hazzard town by three o'clock. You got that?"

"Yes sir," said Tommy. "CB, channel 9,meet at the garage."

"Good. Hopefully, if all goes well, we'll have you hitched up in no time."

"Thank you, Mr. Duke. You have no idea how much this means to me."

Uncle Jesse smiled. "Glad to hear it. See you later."

When Jesse hung up, Kira asked in astonishment, "You're going to try and get us married? You'd really do that?"

"Sure," said Jesse. "Helping people and righting wrongs is what we Dukes do best."

"We won't be doing either if these fellows are who I think they are," said Daisy looking out the window. Kira and the rest of the Duke clan gathered around her to see the Hummer approaching.

_They say the path to true love never runs smooth. And I don't think these guys are here to play Cupid._

As the Hummer inched closer and closer to the farm, Uncle Jesse spoke up. "Alright, here's what we gotta do: Daisy, take your Jeep and get them to follow. Now they got more horses than you, but I figure you can outdrive them for a few miles. That ought to buy the rest of us enough time to bail."

"Yes sir, Uncle Jesse," said Daisy as she headed out the door. She quickly hopped into her white Jeep with a golden eagle, nicknamed "Dixie." She tore across the yard and onto the dirt road.

Smith was driving the Hummer as he and Wesson saw Dixie speeding away. Wesson said, "Look! She must be in that Jeep."

"Maybe, maybe not," said Smith. "I'll slow down enough to let you out and I'll chase that Jeep. You investigate that farm." Smith let up on the gas some and Wesson hopped out. As Smith began chasing Dixie, Wesson made his way towards the Duke farm.

Seeing what had transpired, Bo said, "Bad news, Uncle Jesse: One of the soldiers is headed straight for us."

"I anticipated that," said Jesse, keeping the situation under control. "That's where you boys, come in. Take the General and distract him."

"How?" asked Bo.

"Any old how," answered the Duke patriarch. "Run circles around him, kick up dust. . . just keep him busy long enough for Kira and I to make a break in my pick-up."

"Consider it done, Uncle Jesse," said Luke as he and Bo headed for their car.

Wesson was coming across a dusty part of the farm when he heard a car horn blaring a tune form the song "Dixie." He saw General Lee headed straight for him. Bo then began running circles around him, kicking up so much dust that Wesson couldn't see.

Seeing that the boys were doing their job, Uncle Jesse put on his faded red cap and said, "Let's go, Kira."

"Right," said Kira with a nod. The two of them then made their way to Uncle Jesse's beat-up old white truck and headed off towards their rendezvous with Cooter.

Smith's Hummer was catching up fast with Dixie. But it was over three miles down the road, so Daisy knew that it didn't matter. She had done her job. The Hummer made its way in front of Dixie, leaving Daisy no choice but to stop. Smith got out of the Hummer and searched the Jeep to no avail. "She's not here."

Daisy then turned and placed her chin on her folded arms on the top of her seat. She gave a charming smile and said, "Aw, and I thought you were after me."

_Now, what man can resist that? I almost feel sorry for that boy._

As the General continued to run circles around Wesson, Luke watched Uncle Jesse's truck until it was out of sight. "It worked, Bo. Let's get out of here."

"Yes sir," said Bo as he turned to a stop and drove away, leaving Wesson in the dust, coughing and struggling to breathe. The Dixie horn sounded again and they were gone.

As they reached the road, Bo picked up the CB and said, "Lost Sheep to Shepherd, Lost Sheep to Shepherd, how are things looking out there?"

"Looking fine, Bo," answered Uncle Jesse. "Ya'll did good."

"Glad to hear it, Uncle Jesse," said Bo with a smile. "Lost Sheep to Bo Peep, you out there?"

"I'm all ears, sugar," said Daisy as she made her way towards the rendezvous point. "Our soldier friend was plenty mad when he saw that Kira was gone."

Taking the CB, Luke added, "And I imagine he's gonna feel worse when he rejoins his buddy."

"Now, you all remember where we're going, right?" asked Uncle Jesse.

"Yes sir," said Luke with a nod. "We're on our way. Daisy?"

"Be there quicker than two shakes of a lamb's tail." Daisy then hung up her CB, her smile never leaving her face.

The Dukes, Cooter, and Kira were at one the Dukes many now-abandoned moonshine stills, discussing their next move. Bo said, "Not only do we have Rosco and Boss Hogg looking for Kira, but we've got those two soldiers hunting for her too."

"And maybe her grandfather," added Luke. "The way I see it, we need to take them out one at a time. And I think the best way to do that is if we have two more General Lees. Cooter, do you have any clunkers that might be able to serve our purposes?"

Cooter smiled and said, "I sure do. Matter of fact, I got two old cars in this morning. They ain't perfect, but I think they'll do the job for us."

"Alright," said Luke with a smile. "Now we just need to draw Rosco and Enos away so that we can get to the garage. Uncle Jesse, we're gonna need you to take the General. Kira, you'd better go with him. That way, all the attention will be taken off of us."

Kira then asked nervously, "Are you sure about this? I mean, no offense, Mr. Duke, but you are old. I mean, we're talking about a major game of decoy with the sheriff."

Uncle Jesse gave her an almost annoyed look. "Kira, evading the law is like riding a bicycle or making love: once ya learn, ya never forget."

Kira was able to easily get in the passenger's side window due to her smaller frame. However, Bo, Luke, and Cooter had to help Uncle Jesse get in the driver's side. It took some doing, but they got him in. Once he was behind the wheel, Jesse pounded the driver's side door with his left fist and exclaimed, "One of these days, I'm gonna chainsaw these dang doors!" The General Lee was then fired up and taking off.

Sure enough, Rosco and Enos were lying in wait a few miles down the road. Seeing the General roll by, Rosco noticed, "That's Jesse Duke! And the girl's with him! Hang on, Flash!" Flash moaned as Rosco and Enos activated their sirens and gave chase. As they were speeding down the road, Rosco said, "Hot pursuit! Hot pursuit! I love it! I love it!"

Kira looked over her shoulder to see the two patrol cars in pursuit. "They're right on our tail!"

"Which is exactly what we want," said Uncle Jesse. He then let out a light laugh.

Rosco got on his CB and said, "Alright, Jesse Duke, pull it over so I can cuff ya and stuff ya!"

Uncle Jesse got on his CB and retorted, "Rosco, you ain't got the know-how or the driving skills to catch a Duke!" He then let out a full-blown laugh. As the General tore up the back roads, Jesse let out another laugh and exclaimed, "Takes me back to my shine-running days!"

Kira said nervously, "You know, somebody really needs to fill out your insanity ward papers." At the same time, though, she couldn't help but smile at this. Here was this old man driving a powerful car and apparently having the time of his life. Finally they came to where two downed trees were almost across the entire road. The General blew through easily, but Rosco and Enos' patrol cars, side-by-side once again, hit a bump in the road and flipped over onto their sides.

Jesse pulled to a stop and he and Kira watched as Rosco and Enos exited through their now-facing-skyward doors. Jesse laughed and said, "They're alright, alright."

_Now, while Jesse was gettin' Rosco and Enos' attention, the others was back at Cooter's garage puttin' Luke's plan in motion. With less than two-and-a-half hours before they were supposed to meet up with Tommy, they had to work fast. Meanwhile, Tommy was gettin' closer to his reunion with Kira, while General Ford had met with his soldiers tryin' to make sure Kira went anywhere but Tommy._

"You mean to tell me that two of my best soldiers were outclassed by a bunch of hicks?" asked General Ford in anger.

"Yes sir," answered Smith humbly.

"First, the engine started smoking and we had to pull over," explained Wesson. "Then these hick boys show up in that orange stock car and argue with us. That was when we lost her."

"I don't want excuses," said General Ford angrily, "I want my granddaughter! I am not going to have her throw away her life with some dinosaur-hunting freak and that noise they call 'rock music.'" The three of them then proceeded to the Hummer and left to search for Kira and the Dukes.

After ditching Rosco and Enos, Jesse and Kira made their way to Cooter's garage. They watched as Bo, Luke, Cooter, and Daisy painted over two old cars to look like General Lee.

Kira was looking out the window when she saw a familiar vehicle approach. "Um, guys, you might want to see this." The Dukes and Cooter moved to the window to see what she was talking about. They saw Smith and Wesson step out of the Hummer, followed shortly after by a gray-haired man in a more formal uniform.

"That's your granddaddy, ain't it?" asked Bo.

"That's him," said Kira with a nod. "General Ernest P. Ford."

"Well, as long as they don't see us before they're supposed to, we'll be just fine," said Luke. "C'mon, let's get back to work."

Kira watched as the three Duke cousins and Cooter worked. She asked, "Why exactly are you guys making two more Generals anyway?"

Luke answered, "It's all part of a little Duke shuckin' and jivin'. You'll see what I mean."

_Now in case ya'll are wonderin' what's going on. . . so am I._

"There. That oughta do it," said Cooter. "Paint won't dry for a while, but we'll be a-okay."

Looking up at the clock, Luke noticed the time. "Quarter til three. Let's hope Tommy's in range." He picked up Cooter's CB receiver and asked, "Tommy, this here's Luke Duke. You got your ears on?"

Driving down the road in his rented red Chevy Silverado truck, Tommy picked up the CB and answered, "I'm here, Luke. What's up? Is Kira still with you?"

"Kira's just fine. Where are you?"

Tommy put down his CB and quickly checked his road map. He put the map back down and picked the CB back up. "I'm probably less than a mile from town. I'll meet you at the garage before you know it."

"Good timing," said Luke. "Listen, I don't want you to park directly at the garage. If Boss Hogg or the Sheriff see you park there, they'll know something's up. Park at Rhuebottom's store just across the street. You can't miss it. Make your way to the back door and knock three times. That way we'll know it's you."

"Understood," said Tommy. "I'll be there."

Ten minutes later, there were three knocks on the garage's back door. Cooter slowly opened it up, Kira standing beside him. When they saw the person's face, Kira cried, "Tommy!" Tommy quickly ran in and they embraced. Kira said, "I thought I'd never see you again!"

"Likewise," said Tommy with a smile of relief.

Daisy was surprised when she saw Tommy. 'He's a professor of paleontology?' she thought to herself. 'Man, he's good-looking! No wonder Kira fell for him.' She realized now that she had been wrong to question Kira's relationship with him.

Everyone was snapped back to reality when Cooter cleared his throat. "I hate to be the one to spoil this sweet reunion, but ya'll ain't out of the woods yet."

"Yeah," agreed Bo. "Now we gotta make sure nobody interferes with your wedding plans."

"But how?" asked Kira.

"You're about to find out," said Luke with a smile.

_Well, it looks like Luke's got a good plan. I only have one question: What is it?_

At the police station, Boss Hogg was sitting at his desk in his office smoking a cigar. Rosco, Enos, General Ford, and his two soldiers were all present. "Mr. Hogg, I am losing my patience!" said General Ford.

Taking his cigar out of his mouth, Boss Hogg calmly responded, "Well, then, you're just gonna have to hold on to it a little longer. Once them Duke boys make their move, we'll make ours."

Suddenly, everyone heard the Dixie Horn blaring outside. Boss Hogg, Rosco, Enos, General Ford, and his two soldiers looked out the window to see General Lee repeatedly circling the town square. Unbeknownst to them, Cooter was at the driver's seat laughing the whole time.

_I'm guessin' that's a fake._

"It's them!" exclaimed Boss Hogg. "Rosco, after them! We can have the Duke boys put away for kidnapping! And I'll be the hero!"

Smith and Wesson looked at each other, observant of Boss Hogg's obnoxious behavior. "Who is this guy?" Wesson asked so that only Smith could hear.

"Ooo, I love the way you think, little fat buddy! Ghh, ghh, ghh!" said Rosco as he began pulling on his brother-in-law's chubby left cheek.

"Will you quit that?" yelled Boss Hogg in annoyance as he slapped Rosco's hand away. "Go! Just go!"

"Yes sir! Yes sir!" said Rosco as he put on his hat. He picked up Flash and said, "Come on, Flash! Daddy's got some Dukes to catch! Ghh, ghh, ghh!" Flash moaned again. She knew very well what the eventual outcome was going to be.

Cooter's General Lee took off upon seeing Rosco approach his heavily-dented patrol car. "Freeze!" yelled Rosco in a futile attempt to slow down whom he thought were Bo and Luke. He got in, put Flash down, and gave chase.

About two miles out of town, Cooter took a dirt road. Rosco called into his CB, "Alright, you Dukes, pull it over!"

"I ain't a Duke," said Cooter, leaving his CB alone. "But I'm not telling you that."

Five minutes after Rosco had left, everyone in the police station heard the Dixie Horn again. "That couldn't be," said Smith. Everyone looked out the window to see General Lee once more circling the town square. This time Daisy was behind the wheel laughing all the way.

_There's another fake._

"Dang that Rosco," said Boss Hogg. "I knew I couldn't count on him for nothin'! Enos, get out there and arrest them Duke boys, along with that ninny you call a boss!"

As Enos headed for the door, he suddenly stopped. He turned to Boss Hogg and asked, "You mean you, Mr. Hogg?"

"No! That dummy Rosco, dummy! Now go!"

"Yes sir, Mr. Hogg." Enos then ran out to his also heavily-dented patrol car as Daisy's General Lee took off. "Possum on a gumbush, General Lee's goin' awful fast today." He got in, turned on his sirens, and took off in hot pursuit.

The remaining Dukes, Kira, and Tommy looked on as Enos drove away. Bo smiled and said, "Enos'll take that bait any day." This in turned got smiles from everyone else and a light-hearted laugh from Uncle Jesse.

"Now it's up to you boys to finish what Daisy and Cooter have started," said Uncle Jesse.

Luke responded, "Another ten minutes, and we'll be doing just that."

_Right now, nothing is what it seems. But that's Hazzard_.

Cooter was still running from Rosco when he checked his watch. He smiled and said, "It's time." He then swerved and pulled to a stop.

Rosco's patrol car halted as well. As he got out, Rosco was ready to throw the book at the Dukes. "Alright, you Dukes, you're under arrest. . ." He trailed off when he realized who he'd caught. "Cooter?"

"Hey there, Rosco," said the local mechanic with a smile. "What was it you were sayin' about arrestin' me?" He then laughed as Rosco looked on dumbfounded.

After a ten-minute drive, Daisy swerved to a stop. To say Enos was surprised by this would be an understatement, but he stopped anyway. As he got out and made his way toward what he assumed was the General Lee, he said, "I'm sorry boys, but I gotta take ya'll in. . ." He then trailed off when he saw the driver. This surprised him even more. "Daisy?"

Daisy leaned on the windowsill of the driver's side door with her beautiful smile and asked, "Are you disappointed, Enos?"

Enos gave a goofy grin to the girl he'd had a crush on for the longest time. "I ain't never disappointed to see you, Daisy."

Meanwhile, back at the police station, the Dixie Horn was heard again. "How many of those orange-colored cars do you have in Hazzard?" asked General Ford with anxiety.

"There's only one," explained Boss Hogg.

"Make that three," said another voice. All eyes turned to see someone standing in the doorway of Boss Hogg's office.

"Luke Duke?" asked Boss Hogg in confusion.

"Where's my granddaughter?" demanded General Ford.

Pointing to Boss Hogg's window, Luke said, "See for yourselves."

Sure enough, General Lee, THE General Lee, was sitting outside.

_Now THAT'S General Lee._

Sitting on the windowsills were Kira on the driver's side and a dark-haired man on the passenger's side. Both waved at their watchers. "That's her!" said the general, recognizing his granddaughter. He also recognized the young man with her. "And that Oliver boy!"

"Who?" asked Boss Hogg.

"Tommy Oliver!" answered the General. "The one I'm trying to stop Kira from marrying!"

"You can try all you want," said Luke. "But they're getting married and there ain't nothing you can do about it."

"Oh, is that so, plowboy?" asked the General. He, Smith, and Wesson then began to move toward Luke. But Luke pushed a rolling chair into Smith, catching him off-balance. This gave Luke enough time to make a break for the General.

Outside, Bo turned the General around, ready for a quick getaway. Luke ran outside and hood-slid to the passenger's side before climbing in through the window.

As General Lee took off, General Ford and his soldiers were making their way towards their Hummer. "I'm driving this time!" said the older General. And as the Hummer left in pursuit of the Duke boys, Kira, and Tommy, Boss Hogg got into his white Cadillac with steer horns and followed.

At the site where Rosco and Cooter were, Rosco got on his CB and said, "Good news, Boss! I got General Lee and Cooter behind the wheel!"

Back at Daisy's spot, Enos listened in confusion at his superior officer's report. He grabbed his CB and said, "Sheriff, you must be losin' you eyesight or something, cause I've got Daisy in the General, and I don't think she's done nothin' wrong."

Rosco then said, "Enos! It ain't your place to think! And I ain't lost nothin', cause I know General Lee when I see it!"

Hearing this as he drove, Boss Hogg took his CB and said, "You numbskulls! You got snookered by fake General Lees! I'm chasin' the REAL Duke boys in the REAL General Lee, on Highway 45 headed toward Blackshere Gorge."

Confused, Rosco asked, "Boss, are you sure you're not plumb out of your mind?"

"I ain't plumb out of nothing, you pea-brain! Now get over here and help me or not only will you and Enos be lookin' at unemployment, but I'll divorce my wife, your fat sister Lulu, as well!"

"Ooo! That I understand, Boss. I'm on my way!" He then got back in his patrol car, turned on his sirens and changed course.

As Rosco was leaving, Cooter said, "You'll never catch em, Rosco!" He laughed, knowing he was right.

As he drove, Rosco said to Flash, "We're gonna have to go cross-country to catch up, Flash, my darlin'. Hang on!"

Kira and Tommy glanced over their shoulders as the Hummer inched ever closer to General Lee. Kira said, "They're gaining on us!"

"Not for long, they ain't," said Luke. "Tommy, hand me that bow. Kira, hand me a stick of dynamite."

Surprised that he asked for dynamite, Kira cried, "But you'll blow them to Kingdom Come!"

"No way! We're Dukes, we believe in destroyin' property, not people." After being given what he needed, Luke began rigging his stick of dynamite. As he attached it to an arrow, he said, "A 20 charge oughta be enough to put his vehicle out of commission." He then pulled himself to a sitting position out his window.

General Ford and his soldiers watched as Luke aimed at them. Smith laughed and said, "Do you see that? That bumpkin's gonna try and stop us with a bow and arrow! He must be stupider than I thought!" Smith and Wesson laughed as General Ford ignored them, concentrating on driving.

Luke fired. The arrow hit the front grille, exploding on impact, and blowing the hood off. The Hummer swerved across the road as General Ford tried to regain control. The Hummer went off the road and slammed into a tree.

As Luke got settled back in, Tommy and Kira looked out the rear view mirror and checked to make sure the three soldiers were okay. General Ford climbed out, looked out at the departing General Lee, and kicked the tire. "I don't believe this!"

Upon seeing her grandfather exit on his own power, followed by Smith and Wesson, Kira had a wide smile on her face. A big smile on his own face, Tommy chuckled and said, "Looks like they're a-okay."

Bo quickly glanced over his shoulder and cried out, "Yee-hoo!" He quickly refocused on the road.

General Lee then passed a side road and two familiar police cars began giving chase. Hearing the sirens, Kira and Tommy looked over their shoulders. "Rosco and Enos again!" said Kira.

With the General in sight, Rosco grinned and said, "I'm gonna get em. I'm gonna get em. Ghh, ghh!" Enos just grinned and followed.

_Well, you gotta give Rosco one thing: For all his flaws, he sure knows his territory._

As Rosco and Enos pursued General Lee, Boss Hogg wasn't far behind in his car.

Luke then said to his cousin, "Bo, Blackshere Gorge is coming up. Think you can make that jump?"

"Jump?" asked Tommy and Kira in surprised unison.

Bo smiled widely and said, "You know I can, cousin." A few miles later, Bo said, "Ya'll hang on back there!" Using an uphill ledge as a ramp, General Lee took to the air, its powerful engine roaring. As the General took off, Kira held on to Tommy for dear life, while Tommy held on to Luke's seat. The Dixie Horn sounding once more, they cleared the gorge by a foot. The landing rocked the General's occupants, but all were okay.

Following closely behind, Rosco and Enos attempted to make the jump themselves. Realizing too late that he wasn't going to make it, Rosco let out a, "Ooo!" Rosco's patrol car slammed into the side of the gorge and landed hard, with no way to roll out. All Enos could think to do was close his eyes, grit his teeth, and hope he survived. His patrol car landed right on top of Rosco's.

As the General pulled to a stop, Bo, Luke, Tommy, and Kira turned to see if Rosco and Enos were alright. Blackshere Gorge wasn't very deep or wide, so they could see everything just fine.

Enos opened the door of his patrol car and jumped out, landing on his face. He quickly got up and cried, "Sheriff! Are you alright, Sheriff?" He pulled on the door and it fell off.

Rosco got out, shook the cobwebs out of his head and yelled, "Enos, you dipstick! You could've gotten me killed!" He then took off his hat and began chasing his deputy, trying to hit him with it.

In his own defense, Enos said, "It wasn't my fault, Sheriff!"

"DON'T BACK-TALK ME WHEN I'M YELLING AT YOU!"

All occupants of the General laughed. Then Boss Hogg's Cadillac pulled to a stop. He got out and saw Rosco and Enos at the bottom of the gorge and the General on the other side. "Dang, you dang Dukes!" he yelled. "One of these days, one of these days, I'm gonna have you put behind bars forever! Do you hear me?" He then kicked the ground. Unfortunately, he was too close to the ledge! He landed on the ledge on his butt, fell forward, and slid downhill, stopping face-first at the bottom. Bo, Luke, Tommy, and Kira laughed harder.

As Rosco helped Boss to his feet, he asked, "Are you okay, Boss?" Boss Hogg didn't answer. Instead, he began crying and planted his face into Rosco's chest.

Seeing this, Luke said, "Now, let's get you two married."

Bo let out a, "Yee-ha!" as General Lee drove away.

_With Boss Hogg, Rosco, General Ford, and his soldiers out of the way, everything fell into place. The very next day, Tommy and Kira got themselves all hitched up. Just as the Dukes planned._

Tommy and Kira ran out of the church arm-in-arm, the Dukes and Cooter throwing bird seed as the preacher looked on. The Dukes and Cooter were the only people who attended the wedding, but it didn't matter. Tommy and Kira were finally together. All celebration stopped as General Ford slowly approached, surprisingly dressed formally. But there was something else different about him.

_Knowing he'd been beat, General Ford realized that with all his power, he couldn't stop Mother Nature._

He smiled and offered Kira a hug. Kira was hesitant, but she smiled and did it anyway. General Ford then walked to Tommy and offered to shake hands. Tommy smiled and accepted.

"Take good care of her," said the General.

"You know I will," said Tommy with a smile.

General Ford smiled again and reached into his inner suit pocket. He pulled out an envelope and handed it to Tommy. "That should be enough to get you to New York and get yourselves a place to stay. I wish you the best." Tommy saluted and General Ford walked away.

A couple of hours later, with everyone now in their normal clothes, Tommy and Cooter shook hands as Kira sat in a black Jeep.

_And once Cooter had Tommy's Jeep towed to town, it was time for the newlyweds to depart._

"Thanks for getting my Jeep back, Cooter," said Tommy.

Cooter smiled and said, "Anything for a friend. Ya'll come back and see us sometime, ya hear?"

"Sure thing, man."

Getting behind the wheel, Tommy and Kira kissed before Tommy fired up his Jeep. As they began to drive away, the Dukes and Cooter waved good-bye, Tommy and Kira waving back. Kira threw the bouquet out of the open top. Daisy caught it, much to everyone's delight.

_Tommy and Kira headed back to New York so that Kira could get her music career back on track. And like many other couples in Hazzard, Tommy and Kira would go on to live happily ever after. And all because of the Dukes of Hazzard._

The End


End file.
